Follow Your Heart

When someone tells you to follow your heart, what does that mean exactly? What if what your heart is telling you doesn't line up with God's word? But what if the thought of not following your heart makes you sick? I guess the real question is shouldn't the two match up?

I mean if your walking with God and your in His Word, should that verse in Psalms apply? You know the one I'm talking about, the one that says He will give you the desires of your heart?

Before anyone comments...I know what the verse means. I know it doesn't mean that He will give you what you want or even think you need. I know that it means that your heart will align with His, your desires will match His desires for you.

So I guess that's my next question. What went wrong? Why isn't my heart aligned with His? How did we get on two seperate pages. Shoot, today I feel like were in two totally different books.

I jumped the gun. Somewhere along the way I decided that I knew better than God. That I knew what I wanted and needed and I went ahead and got it without so much as asking Him what He thought.

And so here I sit-heart sick, distracted, confused, hurt, sad, and lost. I'm missing Jesus. In the midst of all the craziness the last few weeks I walked away. He has patiently sat and waited. I want to be where He is at. I want things to change. I can't live in mere survival mode. In fact, I'm convinced that it's an insult to God. He didn't send His son to die for me just so I could barely make it through my day without falling apart. He sent His son to die for me so I could, to quote His exact words, 'have a rich and satisfying life'.

So why do we settle for less that He gives? Why do we settle for less than we deserve? Why is it so easy to get 'caught up' in the things of this world. Even more so, why is it so hard to walk away?

Lots on my mind today...